Father Sez

Ron over at the Wisdom Journal wrote an interesting article titled “My worst decision ever” and that everyone should learn from the mistakes he had made. 

Ron detailed that the two lessons that his worst decision ever had taught him were :- 

a)    Marry a good person and 

b)    Never to take a job because of money. 

I want to talk a little about Lesson (a). 

Marrying a good person may be a little easier said than done, as I am sure that though all of set out to do exactly this, the divorce statistics do not bear testimony to our outstanding success. 

Courtship and marriage are two different stages in life. It has been said that man is deaf and the lady blind during courtship and these senses come alive again after marriage.

Last November, my wife and I celebrated our 23^rd wedding anniversary. When one of my younger colleagues asked me about my secret to this long marriage, I answered, (a little tongue in cheek, perhaps), that all I did was to keep saying “Yes, dear”. 

This morning, I received an email from a friend, titled “Trust”. In this mail, there was a paragraph on accepting and forgiving our spouse’s shortcomings. (As usual, we are more receptive and forgiving of our own shortcomings.) 

The advice given was:- “Never criticize your spouse for his/her shortcomings or when he/she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of the shortcomings and weaknesses, he/she could not find a better husband/wife than you.” 

These are great words of wisdom. Words that should automatically run in our minds as soon as we feel the urge to open our big mouths and start saying things that we would most probably regret. 

It’s not just a matter of chance that we marry a good person. There is “work” involved in making the marriage work. Work to be done by both husband and wife in showing appreciation and respect for our significant other. 

Ron’s article may give us an assumption that he simply married a great, thoughtful and understanding wife.  But I am sure he has put in more than his fair share of work in ensuring that this is so.